That's a lot of me...

Confession(s)...

I want to write a book. 

I want to write songs.  

I want to write this blog.

I want to have a book published.  

I want to have my songs recorded. 

I want to share this post.

I want people to love my book. 

I want people to sing my songs.  

I want people to read my blog.

I want my book to change minds.  

I want my songs to change hearts.  

I want my blog to change lives.

Reality...

I have no clue where to start. At this point, I have no storyboards, I have no score sheets, I have no followers.  Right now, all I have is....excuses.

I'm too busy with play dates and practices.  I'm too tired with a house full of toddlers and preteens. Aren't there enough books and songs and blogs?

I only have so much to give. 

But I still have so much to give.

It's just....buried. In there....somewhere.

I'm working my way through a great book, Let's All be Brave - Living Life with Everything You Have, by Annie F. Downs.  

Can I just stop here a second and say, "Annie.  Will you be my sister? This book has made me fall in love with you (and I'm really only half way through.) I want you to be best friends with all my best friends. I want you to come to my parties and do cartwheels with my daughter in the backyard.  I want you to come and tell your stories and be someone who is enthralled with mine.  I'm already imagining your ubercute facial expressions when I tell you something funny or exciting or unbelievable. You are already my people and we've never met. Thank you." {And yes.  I unashamedly trolled the internet looking for your lovely face to enhance my blog and new obsession with our future relationship. Everyone is welcome.}

Anyway. This. Book.  I'm already half way through and I can't imagine where it's going to take me next.  But here is were I am now: this blog, this post, today. Dreaming about the day when I will be brave and write that book, record that song, and lay it all out on this blog.  Maybe that day is today. Maybe today is the day to start digging up that "talent" the Lord has entrusted to me and make something of it.*

What if?

What if I took my love of writing and actually TRIED to write a book?

What if I took my skill for song writing and actually TRIED to record something?

What if I took all my ideas and laid them out for the entire internet to see?

That's a lot of me - out there for the great big world to see.

I think it's time to be brave.

*For the record.  The chapter that has me undone in Annie's book is completely inspired by a book she was reading called, Freefall to Fly - A Breathtaking Journey toward a Life of Meaning, by Rebekah Lyons. And here I am also saying, "Come on, Rebekah.  Be my sister. Please and thank you."